Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Zombies and Vampires are in every game you own!


I was trying to put some thoughts together for a review of Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon. The problem I quickly found was that I have a core belief, but it is one that I haven't really told too many people. So, I better make some steps to get this thought "out there", so to speak.

This thought is; Why are we complaining about zombies in every game, when EVERY game is either about zombies or vampires?

Seriously, your enemies in a game? They are either zombies, or vampires. If they outnumber you, but aren't as powerful as you, then they are simply zombies. Traditionally, it is sheer weight of numbers that give zombies the edge. Individually? What the hell is one zombie going to do, rot all over your garden? But, get 50 of the buggers leaning at your door, and those hinges won't hold too long.

Whereas, the other end of the scale is the vampire. Now, your standard vampire works alone. Why? Because he is BAD ASS. This is a guy who quite simply has you beat any time he wants you beat, easy as that. He doesn't need help, but frequently surrounds himself with underlings.

So, let's take Halo. Grunts are zombies, Elites are vampires.

Or perhaps we go with Mario? Easy. Koopas and Goombas are zombies, Bowser is a vampire.

Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "But, I beat those vampires!" Bully for you. But, that in itself does not disprove the theory.  OF COURSE you beat them! The game itself was built from the ground up so that you could beat them. Usually, you get some serious help along the way, be it in the form of an Uberweapon, or some latest and greatest superpower, or just lots of help from your own GOOD underlings. (or even just some friends.) Also, your standard vampire always loses, and then comes back from the dead. (This would be the sequel.)

My Earth Defense Force review is coming soon. I just need to give people time to ingest this theory for now.

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